A Room of One’s Own

Sometime in 1997, when I first hooked up a computer to the “world wide web”, our dining room was converted to a family computer work space. The dining room became more of an office space in 1998, but it wasn’t until 2004 that I completely made the space “mom only” space. But as any other mom knows, rarely does “mom only” space stay “mom only space. My monitor was bigger – or my processor faster – or someone wanted the scanner. You know how it goes. When I finally purchased a laptop in 2006, I semi abandoned the space. With a heavy travel schedule, and the ease of working in the living room – or my bedroom – it didn’t seem to matter. I could work anywhere at anytime.

The harsh reality of this hit me, though towards the end of June. I was working on items for my largest client – and working on the launch of the “Dreams & Realities” issue of All Things Girl. The morning I woke up and my laptop was on the pillow next to me was the day I realized that I needed to reclaim some real office space in my home.

“The morning I woke up and my laptop was on the pillow next to me was the day I realized that I needed to reclaim some real office space in my home.”

The space in the dining room was no longer suitable even though it housed all my technical books and desktop computer. My oldest had moved into our spare room, so the logical solution was to turn our spare bedroom into an office. Honestly, I had been planning to do it for months, but just…hadn’t done it.

I was tempted to just clear out the room, set up a new desk and live with what was there, but the daisy and ladybug wallpaper border, the dirty walls, and the stained carpet were kind of depressing me. I know that environment can affect people, and when I worked outside in an office, I always wanted the space of those people who reported to me to be pleasant, so I bit the bullet and dug in. With the help of a friend, the room was turned from bright and dirty kid space to muted and inspiring adult space. The white walls became gold. The red and yellow wallpaper became black, green and brown. The bright white switch plates became antique bronze to match the hardware on my desk as well as the wallpaper. The final piece was to replace the grey Berber carpet – with some sort of strange spots that had been hidden under where the bed had been – to a plush beige carpeting.

Then I created a clean and meaningful feel to the room. I put up a few photos…inspirational quotes….and favorite mementos. My bookshelves contain favorite books, my reference books, and all those writing filled notebooks.

According to Virginia Wolfe, in order for women to have the ability to be open to their creativity, they needed two things: A Room of Their Own – and financial independence.

While I can see how financial independence can be a blessing, I certainly don’t see how it’s practical. It makes me wonder, honestly, how much passion you can have if you have the leisure to write. Some of the best selling authors of our current times have written because of the sheer passion (JK Rowling for example). But Space? Oh, Virginia, darling…I’m right there with you….

I personally believe that having space of your very own can be a critical piece to the creative soul. No matter how chaotic my house or life becomes, I am discovering that spending an hour of quiet in my office is like a trip to the spa. My other family members (including the dog) seem to think so as well because I find them wandering into my office for moments here and there. Even a guy friend of mine stood just looking at my office recently and complimented me on the space – telling me he wished he had something like it at his house.

One of the mistakes I’ve made is that I never allowed myself personal space anywhere within my home. For ages, I kept a spare room filled with boxes and things I didn’t need rather than go through the painful process of tossing and clearing the room to create some space. Biting the bullet and giving myself this office was a step I needed to begin to figure out what I want in my life. In the five months since my office has been completed, I’ve made more progress than I had in the last year. Why? I was allowing myself the room I needed in order to think.

I think that it is so hard for any of us to find the quiet space in our heads, especially as we become busier in our lives…and try to squeeze more tasks into each day. Women need sanctuary within their homes in order to think….dream…..to not only reach goals they are setting for their lives, but actually be able to make those goals.

(Photo: Deb Smouse)